Funny Things I Learned Traveling Overseas with Kids

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Funny Things I Learned Traveling Overseas with Kids

Earlier this summer we took our first trip overseas as a family of four. And no, this wasn’t some Eat, Pray, Love boho odyssey or even a well-planned multi-city sightseeing tour. It was a simple two-week trip to visit my husband’s family in his cute little hometown in a picturesque county in the middle of England. Not exactly exotic or edgy, but my kids are young (almost seven and barely four), and for them this was the trip of a lifetime. For me, it was a welcome opportunity to revisit a place and a family that I now love as my own, and share in the wonder and excitement of travel through my kids’ eyes. It also came with some rather humorous lessons.

Don’t drink funky smelling days-old iced tea the afternoon before your flight.

The day before we left Columbus for England it was really hot, and like most summer days, my kids played outside with their friends and needed me to help supervise a bit (remember, they’re young). I looked in the fridge for a cool drink to take outside and found a jar of sun tea I had made that weekend. It looked ok but smelled kind of sulfur-y. But like I said, it was hot, so I thought ‘ah well,’ and downed a big glass of it. The rest of the day was busy and I was up fairly late making sure I had everything in order for our departure the next morning. By the time I crawled into bed my legs were aching. Thinking it was just fatigue and overexertion, I took some Tylenol and tried to fall asleep. But then the tummy started churning most unpleasantly. By 2 a.m. there was some not-so-fun business taking place in the bathroom. By 6 a.m. I was bowing to the porcelain god. Luckily in my misery I (what else?) posted my terrible fate to Facebook and a kind, awesome neighbor immediately texted with an offer of multiple doses of anti-nausea medication left over from pregnancy. Seeing as my husband felt super sorry for me but was under no circumstances going to change our flights, I took her up on it and it worked like magic! I was still somewhat queasy early on in the trip (not sleeping at all probably contributed), but I made it across the pond intestinally intact.

If you’re feeling queasy on a flight, invariably the person behind you will vomit.

Yep. I was holding down my end of the bargain as we taxied down to the runway at Newark Liberty when I heard weird noises coming from the woman sitting directly behind me. I discreetly turned to look and saw her hyperventilating into a barf bag. Cursing my luck I slammed some Altoids, jammed my fingers into my ears and silently prayed that she didn’t hurl. But she did, albeit very politely, and only once. Unfortunately, the cabin crew also witnessed the performance and threatened to turn the plane around if she didn’t perk up quickly. Turns out, upon serious flight-attendant interrogation, that my lovely co-traveler had not eaten since breakfast time (it was now 7 p.m.) but had consumed three glasses of wine and a pain pill over the course of the afternoon, thus the spewing. Luckily (and unsurprisingly) she slept the whole way to England.

Airplane bathrooms aren’t designed for two occupants, no matter how little one of them is.

And with two kids with tiny bladders, we were in the bathroom a lot. Luckily the bathrooms were super close to our seats. But so were the elbows, rear-ends and clothed genitals of all of the other passengers waiting in line for those bathrooms.

Some grown-up fliers are actually nice to kids.

The four of us were split over two adjacent rows, with my husband and me on the aisle and our kids in the middle seats. Meaning that two unsuspecting travelers had to be trapped in the window seats next to my kids. A guy in his mid-thirties was the lucky one sitting next to my daughter and a young woman got the honors next to my son. Both of them were incredibly nice. My daughter even woke the poor man once when she exited the bathroom before me and needed someone to refasten her seat belt. Also, neither one of them got up from their seats the entire flight. Bladders of steel or just ridiculously good manners, I’ll never know.

Driving in a foreign country is difficult, even if you learned to drive there 20 years ago.

According to my husband, the absolute worst thing about our trip was driving. Because there would be six of us (the four of us plus his parents) out sightseeing around the beautiful Derbyshire countryside, we all decided it would be best if we rented a minivan (aka “people carrier”). But my husband, who has been thoroughly Americanized and suburbanized, hated driving on the much narrower roads, especially in a car that was was relatively large compared to all the others. The van was also a diesel (he hated) and came equipped with preternaturally sensitive collision sensors that would sound anytime the vehicle got too close to an object of any kind. And there were close objects constantly. Parallel parking? Beep! Beep! Beep! Stone wall on a narrow country road as you wait for a lorry to pass? Beep! Beep! Beep! Driving rainstorm? Beep…(you get the picture).

Kids are super adaptable and need less than we think.

Anytime we travel (which isn’t too often, honestly), I worry that my kids will become insomniacs, starve, or generally freak out without the bedrooms, food, toys and friends they’re used to. Luckily, that never happens, and this trip was no different. They easily adapted to life in a house that was much smaller than they’re used to (though normal by English standards), weather that was duller than they’re used to (though who am I kidding? Columbus isn’t exactly the sunshine capital of the world), and food that was definitely different from their everyday diets. They had real fun hunkering down in their bunk beds in my husband’s childhood bedroom each night. My daughter developed an obsession with sausage rolls and Cadbury chocolate. Instead of a playroom stuffed to the gills with toys, they happily played with a few hand-me-down items in their grandparents’ cozy sitting room. Oh, and they actually know how to walk! Up hills! For half-hours at a time!

It is possible for kids to acquire ice cream every single day in a different country.

Apparently, the Brits love ice cream as much or even more than Americans. Maybe it’s just because it was summer or because we tended to go to child-friendly, touristy places, but ice cream shops, stands and vans were everywhere we looked. We probably spent more money on ice cream than real food, but it was worth it.

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Erin
Erin grew up in San Antonio, Texas, and prior to her arrival in Columbus ten years ago, had seen snow only once in her life (when she was five years old). Due to this early lack-of-snow trauma, she has become a compulsive coat and jacket hoarder. Or maybe she's just a real Midwesterner now. Erin has a career past in PR, Marketing and Communications and is currently a stay-at-home mom to a Kindergartner girl and preschooler boy. She has dreams of freelancing now that both kids are out of diapers. She also has dreams of buying a sheep farm in Nova Scotia, but the former is much more likely. Erin's husband is from Derbyshire in England. He has never read Pride and Prejudice, but possibly saw one of the movie versions in school. Erin and her family enjoy not taking long road trips (Driving to Florida? Really?!), entertaining friends at home, and ordering everything through Amazon Prime. As an individual, Erin enjoys walking, listening to WCBE but never pledging (actually she did pledge once and knows she should do it again and promises she will next year), and spending too much time on Facebook. She and her family live in Westerville. You can contact her at [email protected].

1 COMMENT

  1. My husband is a Mancunian and we took our then 19mth old over for her 2nd Christmas to spend with his family. She was a champ! We even took the scariest plane ride in and out of Guernsey (where the hubs was actually born) and so not even fazed. Train ride to London, loved it. Put her in the car seat for a 10 min drive to Target and you’d think we were torturing her 🙂

    I’ve also now checked off my traveling solo with her so I feel like we can do anything now! Who’s up for Australia!!

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